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Famous "Quotes" on Sex

Mon, 29 Jan 2007 08:43:30 GMT

clipped by: Scattered_Fusion

Clip Source: www.2spare.com

My girlfriend always laughs during sex --no matter what she's reading.

Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers)

Don't knock masturbation — it's sex with someone I love.

Woody Allen

Lord, grant me chastity and continence... but not yet.

St. Augustine

You know "that look" women get when they want sex? Me neither.

Steve Martin

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

Woody Allen

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

Rodney Dangerfield

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL.

Lynn Lavner

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

George Burns

Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant.

George Burns

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships

Sharon Stone

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.

Jack Nicholson

Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.

Robin Williams

Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself.

Roseanne

Women need a reason to have sex Men just need a place.

Billy Crystal

According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful.

Robert De Niro

There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?

Dustin Hoffman

There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked.

Jerry Seinfeld

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.

Woody Allen

Tags: celebrity, entertainment, sex, humor, funny, quotes

7 Tips to Simplify Your Life

Tue, 23 Jan 2007 05:30:43 GMT

clipped by: coecoe321

Clip Source: ineedmoretime.com

7 Tips to Simplify Your Life
by Barbara Myers

1. De-clutter. Begin by grabbing an empty shopping bag. Walk around your home. Fill the bag with anything you don't use or love. Place the bag in your car and drop it off at a charitable organization. Repeat weekly.

2. Control your time. Reduce obligations. Learn to say no more often. Even one fewer activity per week can allow you some down time.

3. Do without. Stop impulse purchases. Each item you buy costs more than the purchase price. Consider upkeep costs in both time and dollars.

4. Pare down. Do you really need six spatulas or 30 pairs of shoes?

5. Have a weekly "no noise" day. Turn off the TV and radio. Tune in to nature and your family.

6. Make a list. Split your current activities and tasks into two columns: things I enjoy and things I don't enjoy. How can your reduce the second column and increase the first?

7. Organize everything. What takes up too much of your time? Simplify your routines, paperwork, wardrobe and your life.

Free "50 Ways to Manage Your Time" tips booklet. Visit www.ineedmoretime.com

Publishers may use this article if the bylines are included.

Tags: organization, life

Atheist quotes

Sun, 28 Jan 2007 11:39:11 GMT

clipped by: Chookiepuss

Clip Source: www.delawareonline.com

I cannot believe in a God who wants to be praised all the time.

-Friedrich Nietzsche

I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.

-Stephen Roberts

I still say a church steeple with a lightning rod on top shows a lack of confidence.

-Doug McLeod

Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?

-Epicurus

Science is like a blabbermouth who ruins a movie by telling you how it ends! Well I say there are some things we don't want to know! Important things!

-Ned Flanders

Men never commit evil so fully and joyfuly as when they do it for religious convictions.

-Blaise Pascal

So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence.

-Bertrand Russell

Praying is like a rocking chair-- it'll give you something to do, but it won't get you anywhere.

-Gypsy Rose Lee

We must question the story logic of having an all-knowing all-powerful God, who creates faulty Humans, and then blames them for his own mistakes.

-Gene Roddenberry

If a church sign says it, then it must be so:

http://shortthorts.blogspot.com/2006/10/fun-with-church-signs.html

Tags: atheist