Clipmarks | kidora's 'baby' clips

Fourteen Things That It Took Me Over 50 Years To Learn—by Dave Barry

Mon, 04 Dec 2006 19:35:06 GMT

clipped by: djkraz
clipper's remarks: pretty funny stuff

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

You should not confuse your career with your life.

Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

Never lick a steak knife.

The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above-average drivers.

A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

Your friends love you anyway.

Tags: funny, humor

15 Things It Took Me Over 50 Years To Learn

Sun, 21 Oct 2007 23:14:30 GMT

clipped by: swampfoxz
clipper's remarks: If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be “meetings.”

Clip Source: www.awesomeology.com

15 Things It Took Me Over 50 Years To Learn

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

You should not confuse your career with your life.

Never lick a steak knife.

There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

A person who is nice to you but rude to a waiter is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

Your friends love you anyway.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

Tags: aging

Me and my brand new baby girl!!

Sun, 05 Aug 2007 15:42:20 GMT

clipped by: egoldstein
clipper's remarks: A few days ago my wife gave birth to a healthy, happy, and if i may so myself, adorable baby girl. We named her Logan. Wanted to share a picture with everyone!

Clip Source: www2.snapfish.com

Tags:

Top 13 Worst Slogan Translations Ever

Fri, 05 Oct 2007 17:39:18 GMT

clipped by: rocker
clipper's remarks: Hilarious Translations!

Clip Source: moronland.net

Top 13 Worst Slogan Translations Ever

1) The Coca-Cola name in China was first read as "Kekoukela", meaning "Bite the Wax Tadpole" or "Female Horse Stuffed with Wax", depending on the dialect. Coke then researched 40,000 characters to find a phonetic equivalent "kokoukole", translating into "Happiness in the Mouth."

3) The Dairy Association's huge success with the campaign "Got Milk?" prompted them to expand advertising to Mexico. It was soon brought to their attention the Spanish translation read "Are You Lactating?"

8) When Gerber started selling baby food in Africa, they used the same packaging as in the US, with the smiling baby on the label. Later they learned that in Africa, companies routinely put pictures on the labels of what's inside, since many people can't read.

9) Pepsi's "Come Alive With the Pepsi Generation" translated into "Pepsi Brings Your Ancestors Back From the Grave" in Chinese.

Tags: slogans, translations, coca cola, baby food, humour, funny, idiotic

Do you clean your toilet with Coke?

Tue, 16 Jan 2007 04:38:00 GMT

clipped by: CrazyRedHead

Clip Source: www.wackyuses.com

Discover hundreds of little-known uses for well-known products,
by just clicking on a product!

Alberto VO5^® Conditioning Hairdressing

Alka-Seltzer^®

Bounce^®

Canada Dry^® Club Soda

ChapStick^® Lip Balm

Coca-Cola^®

Cool Whip^®

Crayola^® Chalk

Dannon^® Plain Yogurt

Easy-Off^®

Efferdent^®

Gatorade^®

Huggies^® Baby Wipes

Irish Spring^®Soap

Jell-O^®

Jif^® Peanut Butter

Lipton^® Tea Bags

Listerine^®

Maxwell House^® Coffee

Maybelline^® Crystal Clear Nail Polish

McCormick^®Food Coloring

Miracle Whip^®

Oral-B^® Mint Waxed Floss

Reddi-wip^®

Reynolds Wrap^®

Tags: science, humor, humour, house

Guy Photoshops his Baby to Look Like Famous People. Funny Photos.

Fri, 17 Nov 2006 16:57:31 GMT

clipped by: Scattered_Fusion

Clip Source: www.alvasoft.net

Petit jeu connu (1)

Par alvas, jeudi 25 août 2005 à 15:05 :: Divers :: #406 :: rss

(Photo originale)

Tags: fuuny, photos, baby, photoshop

Cutest Laughing Babys.. Must SEE!!!!

Thu, 05 Apr 2007 16:27:30 GMT

clipped by: bharatsm
clipper's remarks: Verrrrrrrry Cute funny most loveable Babys... Laughing their heart out... WE Adults could learn something here.... and well remember our days as babys too! Cheers.. Have fun.. Enjoy with the whole family!!!

Clip Source: ritemail.blogspot.com

[Video]

Tags: baby, laughing, funny, humour, fun

28 Ways to make a girl smile!!

Mon, 09 Apr 2007 13:12:21 GMT

clipped by: tron2007

Clip Source: masalajokes.blogspot.com

28 Ways to make a girl smile!!

1 . Tell her she is beautiful, not hot, fine or sexy.

2 . Hold her hand at any moment even if it is just for a second.

3 . Kiss her on the forehead.

4 . Leave her voice messages to wake up to.

5 . Always tell her you love her at any and all times.

6 . When she is upset hold her tight and tell her how much she means to you.

7 . Recognize the small things . . . they usally mean the most.

8 . Call her sweety. {not baby}

9 . Sing to her no matter how horrible your voice is.

10 . Pick her over all the other girls you hang out with.

Tags: general, funny

Vagina Clip

Mon, 12 Mar 2007 05:02:53 GMT

clipped by: egoldstein
clipper's remarks: This clip is in honor of the ridiculous decision by a school in New York to suspend a few students for using the word vagina during a reading of The Vagina Monologues.

Clip Source: en.wikipedia.org

Vagina

The vagina, (from Latin, literally "sheath" or "scabbard" ) is the tubular tract leading from the uterus to the exterior of the body in female placental mammals and marsupials, or to the cloaca in female birds, monotremes, and some reptiles.

Clip Source: www.coolnurse.com

The vagina is the opening that is located directly below the urethral opening (where you pee from). The opening is called an orifice, as are other openings in your body.

The clitoris is a sensitive organ and it's function is to provide sexual pleasure.

Clip Source: www.nlm.nih.gov

The vagina allows for the flow of menstrual blood and for sexual intercourse, and is the passageway through which a baby is born.

Clip Source: en.wikipedia.org

The Vagina Monologues is an Obie Award-winning episodic play written by Eve Ensler which ran at the off-Broadway Westside Theatre after a limited run at HERE Arts Center in 1996.

Tags: vagina

Thousands of hyphens perish as English marches on

Sun, 23 Sep 2007 11:59:33 GMT

clipped by: Deepti

Clip Source: www.reuters.com

About 16,000 words have succumbed to pressures of the Internet age and lost their hyphens in a new edition of the Shorter Oxford English Dictionary.

Bumble-bee is now bumblebee, ice-cream is ice cream and pot-belly is pot belly.

And if you've got a problem, don't be such a crybaby (formerly cry-baby)

Researchers examined a corpus of more than 2 billion words, consisting of full sentences that appeared in newspapers, books, Web sites and blogs from 2000 onwards.

For the most part, the dictionary dropped hyphens from compound nouns, which were unified in a single word (e.g. pigeonhole) or split into two (e.g. test tube)

Formerly hyphenated words split in two:

fig leaf

hobby horse

ice cream

pin money

pot belly

test tube

water bed

Formerly hyphenated words unified in one:

bumblebee

chickpea

crybaby

leapfrog

logjam

lowlife

pigeonhole

touchline

waterborne

Tags: hyphens, language, dictionary, words, english

Things to write a list of 100 about

Sun, 11 Nov 2007 02:57:25 GMT

clipped by: willhelm
clipper's remarks: 100 Ways To Be Healthier
100 Things That Make Me Cry
100 Things That Make Me Laugh
100 Things That Nourish Me
100 Skills I Have
100 Things I Value In Life
100 Ways To Make A Difference
100 Things I Find Hard To Share
100 Things I Miss

Clip Source: litemind.com

100 Things I’m Grateful For

100 Things I’m Good At

100 Things I Like About Myself

100 Questions I Want Answers

100 Ways To Improve My Life

100 Things I’ve Accomplished In My Life

100 Things I’d Do If I Had Time

100 Things I Need Or Want To Do

100 Things I Want To Accomplish In The Next X Months

100 Things To Do Before I Die

100 Reasons To Save Money

100 Sacrifices I Have Made

100 Ways I Can Make Money

100 Ways To Make A Difference

100 Things I Believe In

100 Achievements (Qualities) I Am Proud Of

100 Things I Value In Life

100 Ways I Help Others

100 Childhood Memories

100 Things I’d Like To Hear

100 Things I’d Like To Tell My Child

100 Things I Want My Child To Know About Me

100 Reasons To Have A Baby

100 Things I’d Do If I Had Six Months To Live

100 Ways To Be More Creative

100 Things I Could Carry In My Pocket

100 Things I Want To Tell My Mother [Father]

100 People I Admire

100 Memories From My Past

100 Ways To Generate Income

100 Principles To Live By

100 Mistakes I Have Made

100 Lessons I Have Learned

Tags: creativity, personal, mind, gratitude, journal

Ten Habits of Highly Effective Brains

Wed, 17 Oct 2007 21:16:59 GMT

clipped by: Perkalicious11

Clip Source: www.sharpbrains.com

let's review some good lifestyle options we can follow to maintain, and improve, our vibrant brains.

Learn what is the "It" in "Use It or Lose It"

Take care of your nutrition. Did you know that the brain only weighs 2% of body mass but consumes over 20% of the oxygen and nutrients we intake?

Things that exercise your body can also help sharpen your brain: physical exercise enhances neurogenesis.

Practice positive, future-oriented thoughts until they become your default mindset

Thrive on Learning and Mental Challenges

Aim high. Once you graduate from college, keep learning

Explore, travel. Adapting to new locations forces you to pay more attention to your environment

Make your own decisions, and mistakes. And learn from them

Develop and maintain stimulating friendships. We are "social animals", and need social interaction. Which, by the way, is why 'Baby Einstein' has been shown not to be the panacea for children development.

Laugh. Often. Especially to cognitively complex humor

Tags: prepare, technique, tip, brain, organization, improvement, highly effective, habits

Top 13 Worst Slogan Translations Ever

Tue, 19 Dec 2006 12:32:27 GMT

clipped by: amberella

Clip Source: moronland.net

Top 13 Worst Slogan Translations Ever

13) When Parker Pen marketed a ball-point pen in Mexico, its ads were supposed to have read, "It won't leak in your pocket and embarrass you." The company thought that the word "embarazar" (to impregnate) meant to embarrass, so the ad read: "It won't leak in your pocket and make you pregnant."

10) Coors put its slogan, "Turn It Loose," into Spanish, where it was read as "Suffer From Diarrhea."

9) Pepsi's "Come Alive With the Pepsi Generation" translated into "Pepsi Brings Your Ancestors Back From the Grave" in Chinese.

6) Frank Perdue's chicken slogan, "It takes a strong man to make a tender chicken," was translated into Spanish as "it takes an aroused man to make a chicken affectionate."

4) An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the Spanish market which promoted the Pope's visit. Instead of "I saw the Pope" (el Papa), the shirts read "I Saw the Potato" (la papa).

Tags: humor, slogans

Six Perfect Words

Fri, 31 Aug 2007 17:17:10 GMT

clipped by: bignosemousie
clipper's remarks: Submit your own six words. You could be published in the Six-Word Memoir Book. Leave your own six words here too.

He vanished after clipping her obituary.

Clip Source: smithmag.net

Legend has it that Ernest Hemingway was once challenged to write a story in six words. The result was "For sale: baby shoes, never used."

It could be the title of your autobiography, or maybe your epitaph. Shorter than haiku and meatier that a one-liner, it truly makes you take stock of who you are. Try it.

"Take a left turn, then fly."
– Hillary Carlip

Eight thousand orgasms. Only one baby.
– Neal Pollack

I still make coffee for two.
– Zak Nelson

"On the seventh word, he rested."
– Stephen J. Dubner

"My spiritual path is 100 proof."
– John House

"He wore dresses. This caused messes."
– Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Tags: words, literature, reading, books

This is what happens when your father is a graphic designer...

Tue, 17 Jul 2007 11:20:46 GMT

clipped by: Bluephoenix4

Clip Source: www.graphxstaff.com

Tags: funny, cute, fun, photoshop, baby