Clipmarks | coconutshell's Humour collection

Shhh....it's room 8.

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 09:32:44 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: Wha? I thought it was funny.

A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."

Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. "Religion?" "Baptist." "Go to room 18, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."

A third man arrives at the gates. "Religion?" "Jewish." "Go to room 11, but be very quiet as you pass room 8." The man says, "I can understand there being different rooms for different religions, but why must I be quiet when I pass room 8?" St. Peter tells him, "Well, the Catholics are in room 8, and they think they're the only ones here."

Tags: humour, funny, jokes, religion

Trespasser warning!!

Wed, 06 Feb 2008 10:10:50 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: You've been warned!!

Clip Source: www.neatorama.com

Tags: funny, humour, trespassing, photos, photo, picture, prostitute

Girlie things men would enjoy doing themselves

Sun, 13 Jan 2008 00:06:45 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: Quite amusing. A few more at the source.

Clip Source: www.socyberty.com

Pull Each Other's Hair in a Fight

Rugby players all over the world would come out of this tight, intimate, muscle-bag meeting with handfuls of man hair.

Wear a Dress to Work

A dress would solve all the snagging problems and would certainly eliminate the need for constant tie and zipper checks.

Have a Handbag

Man bag

Dude purse

Burly purly

Rough sac

Brute case

Wear Their Hair Long and Styled

create extra height for shorter men

appearance of a longer, thinner head for men with chubby faces

Problems solved for the short, fat, bald and ugly variety of the less fairer of the species

Wear a Bra

If all men wore bras, then no one would know which ones really needed them and which ones didn't.

Tags: humour, humor, men, women, society, taboos

Raving Private Ryan

Tue, 08 Jan 2008 05:13:39 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: Big fish, little fish, cardboard box.

Clip Source: www.b3ta.com

Tags: movie, poster, big, fish, little, cardboard, box, dance, funny, humour

Celebrity Star Wars

Wed, 07 Mar 2007 08:17:28 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: Rowan Atkinson as Obi Wan got me laughing. The Dr. Evil one too.

Clip Source: www.worth1000.com

Gandhi-Yoda (

Crazy fool! I ain't getting on no space ship!!!!

Mr Toda by mjhaylor

Darth Bean by Johnrmcconnell

George by mark24

Darth Picard by TiredTom

Yoda Griffin by buuuudy

May The Force be with Me by reexmc

golda by chainman

dr.skywalker by shaddow

Homogenic Amidala by NakuAku

Tags: funny, humour, humor, star wars, entertainment, photoshop, media

Signs you're at a geek wedding

Tue, 06 Mar 2007 11:35:06 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: Funny....though I'd take the binary ring instead of the Elvish one...

Clip Source: www.bbspot.com

11.

Guests throw USB drives instead of rice.

10.

Bride and groom's first dance as a married couple is to "White and Nerdy" by Weird Al.

Wedding rings are simple gold bands engraved in Elvish.

There are D&D Miniatures atop the cake.

Whoever catches the bouquet is the next to upgrade to Vista.

Groom comes down the aisle to the "Imperial March" from Star Wars.

Bride promises to raise the children on Macs instead of Windows.

Reception table centerpieces are crafted from Lego.

Bride uses Bluetooth headset for her "something blue."

Groomsmen dressed as Star Fleet officers.

Bride and groom answer "Next" instead of "I will" and "Finish" instead of "I do" during vows.

Tags: humour, humor, wedding, funny, geek

Minority Cart.

Tue, 06 Mar 2007 08:31:26 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: I just spent 5 minutes watching this. Excellent time-waster...especially for those with really short attention spans like myself...

Clip Source: www.thebbps.com

Minority Kart

I’m convinced if I watch it long enough he’ll catch ‘em!

Tags: mario cart, nintendo, humour, video games, entertainment, funny

Blindsided

Wed, 28 Feb 2007 05:16:56 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell

Clip Source: www.thesneeze.com

You're hanging out with your six-year-old in his room while he quietly draws a boat on his MagnaDoodle.

The boy stops drawing for a moment, looks right at you and says: "HERE'S THE IMPORTANT QUESTION: What part of the mommy does the baby come out of?"

I just told him, "If you want to know what part of the mommy it is, don't you think that's a good question for mommy? You should go ask her right now."

For being woken up sick, out of a sound sleep to hear "What part of the mommy does the baby come out of?", she gave an excellent answer. She just coughed up a little phlegm and told him, "The baby grows in a part called the womb and when the baby is ready, he comes out through the birth canal." My son was pleased with that answer, came back in and finished his boat. My wife went back to sleep and everyone was happy.

Now here's the even more important question: How do we keep the mommy from reading this, so as not to restrict DADDY'S access to the birth canal?

Tags: thesneeze, humour, blog, family, funny

Creation V2.0

Mon, 26 Feb 2007 16:05:53 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks:

Clip Source: www.cartoonlabs.com

Tags: humour, humor, sinfest, comics, entertainment, 2.0

What's YOUR Viking name?

Tue, 23 Jan 2007 07:00:37 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: Cowpounder eh? Lookout, cow-lovers....hahahahha

Clip Source: www.thequarter.org

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Your Viking Name is...

Kaðlín Cowpounder

(Well, actually, that wouldn't really be your name -- since you're female, your name would be something like "Kaðlín Björnsdottir". But this is the twenty-first century, and you want to be known for who you are, not for who your father was, right? Right.)

Your Viking Personality: You're a fearsome Viking, but you aren't completely uncivilized. The other Vikings make fun of you for that. You have a thirst for battle, and tend to strike first and think later. You're not a "berserker", but you're among the toughest sane Vikings around.

A long sea voyage aboard a Viking longboat would be difficult for you, but you might be able to manage it. You possess some skills which other Vikings respect, though in your case their respect is tinged with fear.

You have a fairly pragmatic attitude towards life, and tend not to expend effort in areas where it would be wasted. Other Vikings would be calling you "tree-hugging hippie peacenik" if the phrase had been invented.

Try a different first name:
Or go back and start over

Interesting Facts about the takers of this test.

Tags: humour, funny, fun, huour, vikings, people, quiz, interesting, internet

Math geek humor

Mon, 22 Jan 2007 12:58:39 GMT

clipped by: travislaborde
clipper's remarks: No, I don't get it. I don't even come close. Are any of you mathy enough to laugh at this?

Clip Source: weblogs.sqlteam.com

Math geek humor

A derivative is walking down the street and sees a hot function.

So he grabs her, takes her into the bushes and differentiates her once.

Little later he sees another function and differentiates her twice.

He goes on an sees this super hot function. really sexy.

So he grabs her and differentiates her once and nothing, differentiates her second time, still nothing.

After 10 unsuccessfull differentiations he gets tired and asks the function:

"How come i can't differentiate you???!???"

And the function answers:

"HA!! That because i'm e^x!!!"

and beats the crap out the derivative.

Print | posted on Monday, January 22, 2007 10:10 AM

Tags: humor

Sports - who wins?

Sat, 20 Jan 2007 03:06:40 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks:

Clip Source: indexed.blogspot.com

Tags: humour, humor, funny, sports, people, men, women

HTML Joke

Tue, 02 Jan 2007 17:30:03 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: I like the comments.

Clip Source: www.neatorama.com

Visual html joke.

If you laughed at this picture, then you are an html geek. I laughed! Now I understand why letters that lean are called italic. -via Militant Platypus

Posted on Monday, January 1st, 2007 at 5:38 pm by Miss Cellania

Category: Blog & Internet, Funny. Feed: RSS 2.0

9 Comments to “Visual html joke.”

ted Says:
January 1st, 2007 at 6:49 pm

That’s just silly.
If it’s already leaning, it doesn’t require the italic tags (probably already in the stylesheet).

Alex Says:
January 1st, 2007 at 7:50 pm

Already in the CSS! Ted, you crack me up!

Tags: humour, humor, internet, web, html, funny, computer, programming, technology

Things Geeks did on New Year's Eve

Tue, 02 Jan 2007 15:13:01 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: I'd have done #3.

Clip Source: www.bbspot.com

Things Geeks Did on New Year's Eve

11.

Kissed their WoW avatar at midnight.

10.

Watched the BIOS date change years.

Hoped for a Y2K+7 bug.

Too busy playing nethack to notice.

Listened to Auld Lang Syne on their iPod.

Popped open a bottle of caffeinated champagne.

Updated their New Year's Resolution database to reflect the passing year.

Defragmented their hard drives.

Stayed up for 24 hours to wish all their online friends in different time zones a Happy New Year at the appropriate hour.

Had to come in to work to upgrade and reboot servers all night long.

Nothing. Real Klingons don't celebrate puny holidays like New Year's Eve.

Tags: humour, funny, humor, internet, people, holiday

Anagram chat.

Thu, 21 Dec 2006 05:39:41 GMT

clipped by: coconutshell
clipper's remarks: Chat. And it chats back...quite amusing

Clip Source: www.sternestmeanings.com

webuser: Hi I'm Coconutshell

sternest: Loutish, chic lemon.
webuser: Who're you calling lemon?

sternest: Unwelcoming, loyal hero.
webuser: Happy Holidays?

sternest: Ya! Happily shod.
webuser: Shod, eh?

sternest: Oh! Shed.
webuser: Well then shed to you too.

sternest: On the hollow-eyed stout.
webuser: Stout? Too heavy...Bailey's is better.

sternest: Beauty! Evil hesitate to sob story.

Tags: internet, web, funny, anagram, humour, humor