Clipmarks | GoldyWorld's clips

Beautiful Passage from Boy's Life

Mon, 30 Jul 2007 07:45:18 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld

Clip Source: midlife-journey.blogspot.com

"I have seen many boys come and go," she said. "I've seen some grow up and set roots and some grow up and move away. The years of a boys life pass so fast Cory." she smiled faintly. "Boys want to hurry up and be men and then comes a day they wish they could be boys again. But I'll tell you a secret Cory. Want to hear it?"

I nodded.

"No one," Mrs Neville whispered, "ever grows up."

Tags: literature, aging, boys, men

Don't Think She's Coming Back

Thu, 26 Jul 2007 03:07:11 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld

Clip Source: www.goldyworld.com

Tags: comedy, humor, beer

Great Prank

Tue, 24 Jul 2007 08:39:17 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld
clipper's remarks: Being a comedian is hard.

Clip Source: www.goldyworld.com

[Video]

Tags: comedy, video

Hey Look

Tue, 17 Jul 2007 05:20:52 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld

Clip Source: www.newyorker.com

Hey, Look

by Simon Rich July 23, 2007

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Keywords: Children;; Teen-agers;; Baseball;; Erections;; Mothers;; Concerts;; Popularity

W hat I imagined the people around me were saying when I was . . .

Eleven:

“Oh, man, I can’t believe that kid Simon missed that ground ball! How pathetic!”

“Wait. He’s staring at his baseball glove with a confused expression on his face. Maybe there’s something wrong with his glove and that’s why he messed up.”

“Yeah, that’s probably what happened.”

————

Twelve:

“Did that kid sitting behind us on the bus just get an erection?”

“I don’t know. For a while, I thought that was the case, but now that he’s holding a book on his lap it’s impossible to tell.”

“I guess we’ll never know what the situation was.”

Tags: humor

Top 10 Things Americans Want but Can't Get

Mon, 16 Jul 2007 06:46:41 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld

Clip Source: www.geekarmy.com

10. Marijuana Decriminalization

9. Universal Health Care

8. Stricter Campaign Finance Laws.

7. Equal Aid to Palestinians and Israelis.

6. Reducing Military Spending.

5. Increased Social Spending.

4. Acceptance of the Kyoto Protocol.

3. A Diplomatic Solution with Iran.

2. Pulling Troops out of Iraq.

1. The Impeachment of George W. Bush.

Tags: politics, america, bush, marijuana

Letter to Doctor Ruth

Mon, 16 Jul 2007 05:39:06 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld

Clip Source: www.picturebookmarking.com

Tags: humor, sex

Awesome MasterCard Spoof

Thu, 12 Jul 2007 05:27:41 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld

Clip Source: www.goldyworld.com

[Video]

Tags: comedy, sex, mastercard

60ish LITERARY EUPHEMISMS FOR MASTURBATION

Wed, 11 Jul 2007 06:42:08 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld

Clip Source: vonnegutsasshole.blogspot.com

60ish LITERARY EUPHEMISMS FOR MASTURBATION

1. Blurbing yourself

2. Burying the lede

3. Challenging Alexander Pushkin to a one-handed duel

4. Coaxing Salinger to come out and play

5. Coming up with a gripping plot twist

6. Conjugating the verb

7. Cooking up a big oily batch of Victory Gin

8. Dangling your participles

9. Deconstructing

The Fountainhead

10. Dipping your madeleine into Proust's tea

11. Finishing the first draft by hand

12. Freelancing for the glossies

13. Getting just a little too into pictures of Dorian Gray

14. Giving it a first pass

15. Giving the protagonist some internal conflict

16. Giving your narrative a Faustian theme

Tags: masturbation, literature

If Men Could Menstruate

Wed, 11 Jul 2007 06:28:55 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld
clipper's remarks: Clips from a famous Gloria Steinem essay.

Clip Source: www.haverford.edu

So what would happen if suddenly, magically, men could menstruate and women could not?

Generals, right-wing politicians, and religious fundamentalists would cite menstruation ("men-struation") as proof that only men could serve God and country in combat ("You have to give blood to take blood"), occupy high political office ("Can women be properly fierce without a monthly cycle governed by the planet Mars?"), be priests, ministers, God Himself ("He gave this blood for our sins"), or rabbis ("Without a monthly purge of impurities, women are unclean").

Street guys would invent slang ("He's a three-pad man") and "give fives" on the corner with some exchenge like, "Man you lookin' good!"

"Yeah, man, I'm on the rag!"

Men would convince women that sex was more pleasurable at "that time of the month." Lesbians would be said to fear blood and therefore life itself, though all they needed was a good menstruating man.

Tags: sexism, women, men, gender

The Late Mr. Common Sense

Mon, 09 Jul 2007 07:40:51 GMT

clipped by: GoldyWorld

Clip Source: mommamiameaculpa.com

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little on her arm, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I know MY Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I’m a Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

Tags: comedy, humor